Green Curtain Songs

by Nate Paladino

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1.
You’ve pulled my teeth I’ve filed your claws And your thorny tirades Used to give me pause But I’ve pricked myself so many times You’ve gotten bored of the bleeding It’s never too much Like it was before And your touch is gentle When my feelings get sore And you always know the words to say To keep me from leaving But I miss the days When what you said could hurt me And I miss the ways That you got under my skin I miss the face You only make when you’re angry And I miss the love We made on Sunflower street You never could fix me And I gave up trying To last an evening Without lying Cause when you tell a story enough It start feels like a memory You’re no different I know you struggle To be indifferent When I get stubborn But now you know it’s better to wait Until I run out of energy But I miss the days When what you said could hurt me And I miss the ways That you got under my skin I miss the face You only make when you’re angry And I miss the love We made on Sunflower street And then we’d wash our hands And try to keep believing That our song and dance Would last another evening But look at us now The spotlight never faded We’ll smile through the glare Til it’s time to take our bows But I miss the days Tangled up in the sheets Of the house we used to share On Sunflower street
2.
I guess the sun still rises Without your head against my chest And the air is awfully clearer Without your menthol cigarettes And the plans we left abandoned Seem adorably quaint And the things I took for granted Seem impossibly attained And I know you’d say you’re sorry That’s what makes it feel so hard Cause you always wanted the best for me Even if it meant us being apart So give me some reason to hate you Cause I’m tired of being mature Give me some bullets to fire your way Cause I’ve had it with this good rapport You gift-wrapped my heart in a bow-tied box Left it beating on my front door And I can’t seem to shake you So help me try to hate you more Hitch my name to your CRV And drag it across this town Burn my fields and steal my grain And pour salt across my ground Cause the wind still blows and the walls still creak The same way they used to do And if whiskey was words and tobacco could speak They’d be saying I still love you And I know you’d tell me something That would make me feel ok Until I wake up the next morning And you’re still a thousand miles away So give me some reason to hate you Cause I’m tired of being mature Give me some bullets to fire your way Cause I’ve had it with this good rapport You gift-wrapped my heart in a bow-tied box Left it beating on my front door And I can’t seem to shake you So help me try to hate you more
3.
Succumb 06:10 video
Because I follow you It’s hard to know how you’ll react Thought if I followed in Your footsteps, I’d be shielded from attacks But I’m damned for lack of trying To push past fears of leading us astray I guess it’s gratifying To know that there’s no words that I can say Cause when that look gets in your eyes You never stop until there’s blood Beneath your fingernails from Carving out a certain kind of love That leaves me petrified of losing What my mother warned me of And keeps you satisfied secure In knowing that I will succumb You wear that dress and I succumb You say my name and I succumb You start to cry and I succumb You know damn well that I’ll succumb You know damn well that I’ll succumb You think you’re in control And that you know just what to do To keep me vulnerable To any kind of overture from you It’s hard to argue with Results and darling that’s just what you get Your light keeps flickering And you keep telling me it’s in my head Cause when that look gets in your eyes You never stop until there’s blood Beneath your fingernails from Carving out a certain kind of love That leaves me petrified of losing What my mother warned me of And keeps you satisfied secure In knowing that I will succumb You raise your voice and I succumb You pour a drink and I succumb You slam the door and I succumb You know damn well that I’ll succumb You know damn well that I’ll succumb And after I submit You rest your head against my chest And I can’t stomach it What I’ll promise for a pound of flesh Whatever innocence I had you’ve twisted into something weak That you can use against Me anytime a tear runs down my cheek Cause when that look gets in your eyes You never stop until there’s blood Beneath your fingernails from Carving out a certain kind of love That leaves me petrified of losing What my mother warned me of And keeps you satisfied secure In knowing that I will succumb You touch my hand and I succumb You kiss my lips and I succumb You say you’ll change and I succumb You know damn well that I’ll succumb You know damn well that I’ll succumb You know damn well that I’ll succumb
4.
5.
Well you left me in the gutter Of a street no one goes down With a pain deep in my shoulder And a man deep in the ground And I should have seen it coming Before we came to grips And I should have paid attention To your words instead of your lips When they said I’m not an easy girl to be with I’ll pull the rug out from your feet I’ll wear you down until your leather starts to split Nothing good can come from loving me Well when someone says they’re trouble You take them at their word But we were throwing back double shots And cursing at the world And a couple weekends later When your cellphone woke me up I remember how you shivered When I asked you where you were from And you said I’m not an easy girl to be with I’ll pull the rug out from your feet I’ll wear you down until your leather starts to split Nothing good can come from loving me Well I never thought it mattered What you muttered before bed About some rotten bastard That you left back in Merced Until you told me hurry As he got of his car And you pulled me down an alley But we didn’t get too far And you said I’m not an easy girl to be with I’ll pull the rug out from your feet I’ll wear you down until your leather starts to split Nothing good can come from loving me Well the first shot hit my shoulder And the next shot came from you And when the blood had reached my fingers It was over and he was too As you stumbled towards the body Of the man you left behind I asked if you were bleeding And when you answered me you lied And you said I’m not an easy girl to be with I’ll pull the rug out from your feet I’ll wear you down until your leather starts to split Nothing good can come from loving me Well you left me in the gutter Of a street no one goes down With a pain deep in my shoulder And a man deep in the ground And I should have seen it coming Before we came to grips And I should have paid attention To your words instead of your lips
6.
Nothing seems to matter Anymore Your key still turns but it doesn’t Unlock the same door We went from thick as thieves To on thin ice But that’s that’s what you end up with When you steal you pay the price So our luck’s run out And our skill is lacking And my words are loud And your voice is cracking Our more colorful days Drain the color from your face And this always happens When there’s nothing left to take I drilled into your chest And stole your heart And you snuck down my throat And took the breath from my lungs And after that a simple break in Isn’t hard A couple months of good rapport Then you just walk in the front door But our luck’s run out And our skill is lacking And my words are loud And your voice is cracking Our more colorful days Drain the color from your face And this always happens When there’s nothing left to take You started occupying All my time And oh so smooth I didn’t notice And when I did I didn’t mind I took all of the strength That I could find And when you finally realized There was none of it to hide Now our luck’s run out And our skill is lacking And my words are loud And your voice is cracking Our more colorful days Drain the color from your face And this always happens When there’s nothing left to take
7.
8.
The sun doesn’t set here It just takes a little nap And the air doesn’t cling to you It just pats you on the back And there’s nothing I can’t dream of That I can’t try to make come true And my dollar goes much further When it isn’t carrying you Cause now it’s blue skies and Mai Tais In eighty-five degree weather With clean air in a place where We would have never gone together Your memory’s as faded As the linen of my shirt So I think I’ll spend some time With women that don’t make me hurt I was walking down the beach And a man was baiting a hook And a book was chasing a seagull And his mom was reading a book And I could barely feel your bitter tongue Tearing my reverie in two So I’m glad that I didn’t come here with you Cause now it’s blue skies and Mai Tais In eighty-five degree weather With clean air in a place where We would have never gone together Your memory’s as faded As the linen of my shirt So I think I’ll spend some time With women that don’t make me hurt I can talk to the woman at the front desk And she doesn’t seem to mind If I ask her how the day went It went good, then how about mine And I know there’s nothing to it It’s just kindness among strangers But spending time with you made Me forget that kind of behavior But now it’s blue skies and Mai Tais In eighty-five degree weather With clean air in a place where We would have never gone together Your memory’s as faded As the linen of my shirt So I think I’ll spend some time With women that don’t make me hurt
9.
Whenever you call me up I know it’s cause you’re feeling down And for a night I make you feel like a million bucks And in the morning you’re nowhere to be found I eat up the scraps that I’m given From the table where you sit on high Where your smile’s more pristine than your linens And the blood doesn’t show in your eyes But when you’ve got sorrows to drown And none of your friends are around You come and drown them me You come and drown them me Come on and drown ‘em with me Come on and drown ‘em with I know you want to be near me When everybody’s closing up their tab You call me up late just to hear me say That the key is still under the mat You blabber out some kind of reason Why you couldn’t come and see me before But I’m not gonna try you for treason So come in, drop your coat, shut the door Cause when you’ve got sorrows to drown And none of your friends are around You come and drown them me You come and drown them me Come on and drown ‘em with me Come on and drown ‘em with I’ve been swimming for so long now I’ve forgotten what it’s like to be dry I’m sloppy on my feet any day of the week But I’m a bullet in a pool full of rye But I’m not as deep of a diver As you seem to want me to be When you push me under your waters And leave struggling to breathe Cause when you’ve got sorrows to drown And none of your friends are around You come and drown them me You come and drown them me Come on and drown ‘em with me Come on and drown ‘em with You’ve tried to quit me so many times That it’s become a kind of morbid routine You say your goodbye with some trite cliche And I answer with a sad repartee A week goes, sometimes a month And then you call me at a quarter to three And god knows I’m ready to bury the hatchet In a bottle of Glenmorangie Cause when you’ve got sorrows to drown And none of your friends are around You come and drown them me You come and drown them me Come on and drown ‘em with me Come on and drown with me Come on and drown with me
10.
I still have glitter on my jacket And my shirt smells like perfume We really made a night of it And pushed the morning back til noon A business trip four times a year Another Valentine’s in June You told me he’s a man to fear But I’m done howlin’ at the moon Tired of secret texts at one AM After putting him to sleep Tired of hearing you break down And telling me your his to keep Tired of parking on darkened streets In some god forsaken town Tired of sweating through my sheets With dreams of your lips kissing him You’ve given me your secrets And you’ve given me your word But hearing you make promises Is bordering on the absurd Cause every night you break it off With me, you break his heart Lying through your teeth is easy When your smile’s a work of art Tired of secret texts at one AM After putting him to sleep Tired of hearing you break down And telling me your his to keep Tired of parking on darkened streets In some god forsaken town Tired of sweating through my sheets With dreams of your lips kissing him You call yourself a victim And I’m not sure who to blame All I get are bits and pieces Soaked in alcohol and shame Cause for every tear you shed We pop a bottle of champagne And the fog around my head Puts off my doubts for one more day But when you leave I feel a chill Move through my chest and start to build Until my teeth begin to grind Cause I can’t you off my mind A shower’s never hot enough To burn your touch off of my skin Ah, It’s not you I’m thinking of It’s your lips pressing against him Tired of secret texts at one AM After putting him to sleep Tired of hearing you break down And telling me your his to keep Tired of parking on darkened streets In some god forsaken town Tired of sweating through my sheets With dreams of your lips kissing him
11.
12.
In my dreams it’s never peaceful In my dreams you break my heart In my dreams there is a reason Someone else that makes us part In my dreams you take off suddenly With so much left unsaid In my dreams you leave a knife in me And desecrate our bed But no You still adore me And Lord knows that I’m still In love with you But I know I’ll fade away, the day you leave And with 700 miles between us We’ll both end up finding someone new In my dreams you’re on an airplane In my dreams you’re his to keep In my dreams I drink you back again And fuck you in my sleep In my dreams I pay top dollar For your likeness or your name In my dreams you are a catalyst Your absence for my fame But no You still adore me And Lord knows that I’m still In love with you But I know I’ll fade away, the day you leave And with 700 miles between us We’ll both end up finding someone new In my dreams you leave me wallowing With ends that I can’t meet In my dreams you leave me following Your ghost out on the street In my dreams there is a story Something I can sing about With gravel in my voice And some words that I could shout But no You still adore me And Lord knows that I’m still In love with you But I know I’ll fade away, the day you leave And with 700 miles between us We’ll both end up finding someone new Now we’ve talked it over daily To win you have to lose Your career is more important Than a year of “I love you”s So remember me at least For a couple painful weeks How I tried to be my best for you And made room in my chest for you And used to call you kitten You liked that I recall So kitten, keep your chin up When you land, give me a call
13.
Well if love’s what you want Then I’ll give up and throw in the towel And if blood’s what you want Then I’ll grab it and wipe up the floor And if peace is your goal Then I’ll hang up my arms all around you And if peace gets too boring I’ll strike the first blow in the war We’ve used up the classic retorts So we try to find synonyms How many ways can you tell me that we’re in a rut How many ways can I ask you To open your heart again And how many ways can you tell me To keep my mouth shut Well if love’s what you want Then I’ll give up and throw in the towel And if blood’s what you want Then I’ll grab it and wipe up the floor And if peace is your goal Then I’ll hang up my arms all around you And if peace gets too boring I’ll strike the first blow in the war You made me a knight That never knew when to stop fighting for you And I made you a princess That never knew when to shut up You made me swear That I’d take a bullet and die for you And then we made love And you told me it wasn’t enough So if love’s what you want Then I’ll give up and throw in the towel But if blood’s what you want Then I’ll grab it and wipe up the floor And if peace is your goal Then I’ll hang up my arms all around you And if peace gets too boring I’ll strike the first blow in the war If I’m as wrong as you say Then let me be fallible And I’ll let you be right About any damn thing that you please Except when you tell me you think That we’re incompatible Cause you got me shackled on a chain And you threw out the key So if love’s what you want Then I’ll give up and throw in the towel And if blood’s what you want Then I’ll grab it and wipe up the floor And if peace is your goal Then I’ll hang up my arms all around you And if peace gets too boring I’ll strike the first blow in the war Your two-headed dogs and the Fire in your eyes make it palpable When you’ve sipped all your whiskey And tell me to go back to hell My sober entreaties to reason Never seem applicable And your sloppy transitions to foreplay Feel like a farewell But if love’s what you want Then I’ll give up and throw in the towel And if blood’s what you want Then I’ll grab it and wipe up the floor And if peace is your goal Then I’ll hang up my arms all around you And if peace gets too boring I’ll strike the first blow in the war
14.
Eighteen bottles of wine, four bottles of whiskey Make a month together feel like a dream As hazy as my eyesight in the morning And as empty as your promises to me Gotta bag you up and take you out of my life Bottle by bottle, dress by dress Letter by letter til it hurts less Gotta bag it all up and take you out of my life Seems like everything I have is tainted Cause everything I have belonged to you Now I can’t pour a drink without a memory Cause that’s all that we ever used to do Gotta bag you up and take you out of my life Bottle by bottle, dress by dress Letter by letter til it hurts less Gotta bag it all up and take you out of my life Well I used up all my lifelines, I can’t phone another friend And I’m stuck here with the mess you left behind You call me to curse and then you call to make amends And I answer you again for the last time Gotta bag you up and take you out of my life Bottle by bottle, dress by dress Letter by letter til it hurts less Gotta bag it all up and take you out of my life You never grew accustomed to the facets of routine That keep a man from waiting up ‘til dawn I used to think I loved you but you left me feeling mean And I miss but I’m happy that you’re gone Gotta bag you up and take you out of my life Bottle by bottle, dress by dress Letter by letter til it hurts less Gotta bag it all up and take you out of my life
15.
16.
The sound of a door when it's slammed Her echoing cries in the trees The sight of her face in her hands And the mem'ry of her on her knees The curtains make her silhouette Every line of her body's a crease You're only in love when you sweat Over trying and failing to please I never thought I'd be somebody fragile Asking you to handle me with care Taping up my heart with gin and advil Watching you get used to disrepair I never thought I'd be somebody fragile Asking you to handle me with care Leaving out my eggshells on the carpet And watching you track blood across the stairs And watching you track blood across the stairs The night that I left her for you You promised you'd give me some time But time isn't healing the wounds It's salting the wounds with a lime Nothing I say is enough To make you believe in a lie You're able to call all my bluffs Cause I can't look you in the eye I never thought I'd be somebody fragile Asking you to handle me with care Taping up my heart with gin and advil Watching you get used to disrepair I never thought I'd be somebody fragile Asking you to handle me with care Leaving out my eggshells on the carpet And watching you track blood across the stairs And watching you track blood across the stairs The gun at the bottom of her purse Your hands when they clasp on my wrist The whiskey on her every word Your vodka with ice and a twist The last time I made love with her The first time you'd ever been kissed Her dress as she walked out the door And your pretty face caught in the midst I never thought I'd be somebody fragile Asking you to handle me with care Taping up my heart with gin and advil Watching you get used to disrepair I never thought I'd be somebody fragile Asking you to handle me with care Leaving out my eggshells on the carpet And watching you track blood across the stairs And watching you track blood across the stairs
17.
Every weekend ends like this We fuck, we fight, you yell, I cry, we kiss Too drunk to remember how it started So we start it all again each Friday night I can’t stand to lose you But I can’t stand losing more And I can’t bear the sight of your hand Reaching for the door I can't read your thoughts and baby you're not in my head So baby.... let's go solve our problems in bed Love is kind and love is patient But my patience is running thinner than my skin Love holds no grudge but it remembers And your faith in me’s as shaken as your gin I can’t stand to lose you But I can’t stand losing more And I can’t bear the sight of your hand Reaching for the door I can't read your thoughts and baby you're not in my head So baby.... let's go solve our problems in bed Now it’s sometime on a Bloody Mary Sunday And we’re both two words away from skipping town The carcass of a Saturday is burning And we’re both too proud to let ourselves break down I can’t stand to lose you But I can’t stand losing more And I can’t bear the sight of your hand Reaching for the door I can't read your thoughts and baby you're not in my head So baby.... let's go solve our problems in bed When the lights are dimmer, it’s harder to stay mad And when your voice gets softer, I remember what we had Your touch can make me shiver, and your lips make me forget How hard you make forgiveness, and how easily I make threats I can’t stand to lose you But I can’t stand losing more And I can’t bear the sight of your hand Reaching for the door I can't read your thoughts and baby you're not in my head So baby.... let's go solve our problems in bed
18.
You were tired of living in the wreckage Of a crash you've made me tell you all about Some things broken never do get mended They just learn how to act whole when they go out Nobody I know says I can blame you For leaving when the tears begin to start And all that I can do is call you names that make me blue Cause I got too many band-aids on my heart You could never trust me but you made me feel safe For 18 days and half as many months You kept finding wounds I meant to cover And made me say where each of them was from Nobody I know says I can hate you For leaving when you see me fall apart And all that I can do is call you names that make me blue Cause I got too many band-aids on my heart You fit me like a glove but you got too used to my fist When it banged against that door you liked to lock And I'm sorry for not the space to just exist Cause god knows I'm a man that likes to talk Nobody I know says I can curse you But the hell with them they know that I'm not smart Cause all I know to do is call you names that make me blue Cause I got too many band-aids on my heart And of course you call me sober When I'm three sheets to the wind And you say that you'd come over But you can almost smell the gin And that was always like you At your best while I was hurting Though everybody says you're at your best Now you're alone Cause you were going crazy living in the wreckage Of this spun out metal husk I call my life And I was too self-centered to see the damage I was causing you by making you my wife Nobody I know thinks I should write you They say that we'll be happier apart So all that I can do is call you names that make me blue Cause I got too many band-aids on my heart
19.
20.
Don't know how to do this job Without getting sad and blue Cause every time I write a song It makes me have to think of you I don't know how to write a line Without your face across from mine In your frame there on my desk Reminding of my regrets Don't what know anything that I can do Cause' nothing makes me write 'em quite like you Cause nothing makes a sad song like you baby And nothing else can make the crowd go still Nothing brings the tears on to the paper Like the thought of you and him in Bakersfield Don't know how to write a verse Without your words inside my head Like calling me a dog or worse Not calling me my name in bed Don't know how to make a hook Cause that was always your department You knew how to throw a line And real in a sucker's heart Don't what know anything that I can do Cause' nothing makes me write 'em quite like you Cause nothing makes a sad song like you baby Nothing else can make me feel so small You were making eyes on some tall stranger And I was in the room and saw it all Don't know how to play at bars Unless I keep you on my mind Nothing else makes me sick at heart And makes me sound like I'm on fire Don't know how to sleep at night But it's worth the pain I feel Cause pain is a song that leaves my body Broken but with one more hit Don't what know anything that I can do Cause' nothing makes me sing 'em quite like you Cause nothing makes a sad song like you baby Nothing else can make the lights go dim Nothing brings the mood down to the gutter Like the thought that you'll be better off with him
21.
Friday night and I'm wearing a tie You gave me that makes me look silly I'm holding a flower that's wilted by now Picturing you in something frilly With curls in your hair and lace on your thighs Fire in your face your hands on me The prettiest girl I've been with tonight And you'd slap me and say, “That's not funny.” And your face Keeps me warm at night In your frame With the moon in your eyes And your scent On my pillow still And your body In the ground Why could you have warned me With a letter some kind of sign? Why couldn't you have told me That your love was stronger than mine? I left in a torrent of hot air and hot rain With a mind full of something rotten And I was sure by tomorrow That this whole thing would be forgotten And your face Keeps me warm at night In your frame With the moon in your eyes And your scent On my pillow still And your body In the ground You used to laugh and tell me That I was nothing but trouble That I'd bring you crashing to the ground I said baby let's dance in the rubble Ah, you weren't too good for me as well Hell, maybe we weren't right for each other But someday I'll marry and father a child And wish that you were his mother And your face Keeps me warm at night In your frame With the moon in your eyes And your scent On my pillow still And your body In the ground

about

This is a series I'm doing of mostly weekly, mostly solo, mostly acoustic, and mostly original songs. Indie folk singer/songwriter with a touch of tragedy and a dash of humor.

Each of these songs was recorded live, in front of a green curtain. The videos of each performance are attached here, or you can find them on my YouTube channel.

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released September 21, 2017

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Nate Paladino California

I write and sing sad songs that sometimes sound happy. Mostly about love and toxic masculinity.

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